Rainbow of Tears

On the way driving up the hill today windows rolled down, radio humming,
I find myself softly singing, out loud,
and soon in a block or two at the top of my lungs.

And then I’m swaying, it’s all I can do to keep my brake foot from tapping to the catchy beat. What’s that playing? “Somewhere Over the Rainbow” the funky reggae rendition.

‘Til that moment I hadn’t realized so many months had passed since I’d sung at all.

Oh the windows have been rolled down all right but these warm summer months have not been singing ones not even hummers,
but dying ones, my beloveds dying; me, weeping, weeping no song to be found anywhere.

Today though it declared itself once again: The song my life was meant to sing will not be silenced.

I am breaking out of  rainshadow returning to the land of the living, no longer sitting at one dying bedside and another, then a third, followed by weeks of just sitting, staring, sitting and staring even after those bedsides are empty.

Yes, today I return to the land of the living, to the music playing deep in my bones somewhere, over the rainbow of tears.